I walked up the staircase reaching that one place once again.
It’s that time again where I feel like something heavy is sinking inside my heart and it subconsciously drags my feet to find it’s destination. I took slow steps
towards the wide opened door of the library. It seemed to not be empty but it
felt terribly isolated. Almost all the tables were fully occupied. Except for
one. I could almost as instantly spot her. The same girl again. She who seemed
to always have a smile on her face didn't seem like it right now. I spotted that
empty seat, dispositioned as if someone pulled it out priorly. I took a seat and faced her.
“You’re reading the same book again, I see.”
“Yes. I am.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know, I never really quite get why some things in
this book happen.”
“And how does reading it over and over again helps you?”
She stopped her breath, almost seemed like she caught
herself in a realization.
“It doesn’t. I just wanted to see if it really is there and
I’m not imagining it.”
“You know it would’ve been better if you read another book. It might just please you. I’d hate to see you get bothered and hurt by the
same book.”
She managed to pull a thin smile upon hearing what I said.
“You know me too well to know that I don’t get just get over
a book too easily.”
I took her left hand and patted them under my grasp.
“Don’t. Just put it down.”
“Why not?”
Her dark brown orbs were looking directly at me, as if we
reached that mutual understanding.
“Because the ending is not gonna change just cause you read
it again.”
She sat quiet. Her eyes no longer looking at the pages of
the book that was still in her hold.
“You know I come to the library every day. I love books
and I try to read them all the time I have. But time just comes when I choose the wrong
book and I end up disappointing myself with how it turns out.”
“I do. I do know. But you should know, that doesn’t mean you
should stop coming here and stop reading anything else. Just stop reading this
one. It’ll hurt you more.”
She closed the book in her palm and placed it on the table with
a loud thump.
“How do you feel now?” I asked her, looking at the empty
look in her face was making me more and more worried.
“Put your ear against my chest.” She requested gently before
I did so.
“Can you hear it?”
“…It sounds like glass breaking.”
I pulled myself away and saw the faint smile in her face.
* * * *
I stood up from the table gently, signalling her that I was
about to leave. The book was still on the table but she was no longer looking
at it. It gave me a slight relief, hoping that she really wouldn’t read it even
if I were to leave and something in my heart tells me that she really won’t.
“Don’t let this book stop you from thinking that you can’t find
good books out there. There’re always good books. You just have to look for
them.”
“I know…”
I took two steps forward before she stopped me.
“…cause you are one of those good books I’ve read.”
I looked at the wooden floor and smiled before leaving her
alone again.
